Just For Today

I had one heck of a morning all before 10am.  Missed my exit on the way to work.  Had to deal with silly drama... forgot to pay my meter because of that and got a ticket... Then slammed my already cut hand in the door causing it to burst open yet again.  Needless to say, my day was not off to the best start.  So first I cried for a minute... at work... then decided I needed to pull it together!  I remembered  5 principals of Reiki, which are:

Just for today, I release all worry.

Just for today, I release all anger.

Just for today, I shall earn my living with integrity.

Just for today, I will be kind to every living thing.

Just for today, I will give thanks for all my many blessings.

So I figured just for today, I could do that... Just for today... And tomorrow I could see how I felt and go from there.  You see, I feel like just for a day, I can handle that... And when you start each day with that... one day turns in 2, which turns into a week... etc, until you're perfect... Ha, just kidding, but you get closer to that!  The idea behind this philosophy, is to get people to live in the moment, but for me, it helps me to feel like I can do it, so I can come back to the moment.  I have this little trick I do on the stair machine when I'm getting tired... where I look at how much time I have left and decide that I can do anything for a few minutes.  Fifteen minutes?  That's nothing, I can do anything that long.  This kind of does the same thing for me.  One day?  Ok, I can do anything for one day... even though at many points during that day, I may feel like I can't, I remind myself, "Just one day Laura, that's it!"

So now I feel much better.  I'm enjoying the cool ocean air, listening to the water, and smiling... because after all, I may as well enjoy all of these things while I'm practicing this, since it is for just one day ;)

Today's Silver Lining

"Some day somebody's gonna make you want to, Turn around and say goodbye, Until then baby are you going to let them, Hold you down and make you cry, Don't you know? Don't you know things can change, Things'll go your way, If you hold on for one more day.  Can you hold on for one more day? Things'll go your way, Hold on for one more day." Hold On- by Wilson Phillips

What's Going On

So, it seems that things have been a bit messy lately for most people I've talked to, including myself.  Everyone seems to feel a bit of a disconnect, a bit off track or a bit frustrated.  A few people are searching for ways to change, sensing the need for it.  I've heard a few people blame it on Mercury retrograde, because this all started around then... but I can assure you that's not to blame this time.  There is a change going on, a shift... and according to what I've witnessed and been told, a major phase in that shift just happened.  So for those who wish to get a little clarity, here is a brief explanation in Laura talk of what just happened ;) 

The best way I've come up with in words to describe it is by using a yin and yang symbol.  Picture the symbol in your mind.  This is how we all viewed the world.  Things were black and white, but there was no separation.  They all existed as a unit... though we saw good and bad, black and white, right and wrong... they were a part of one whole that our perception could decipher.  We looked at the whole, and saw what we perceived in that moment.  What happened is that the symbol has now separated, so rather than being able to look at this whole, we now see things more as they are, and also the space between them.  So even though the balance is still there between the yin and yang, our perception of it has been heightened and we are now adjusting to that change.  It's like we just zoomed in on the symbol and now we notice a space between the two main parts which we didn't see before.  While it seemed easier to deal with things in the past because we had just this one thing to look at with no awareness of the space between, it will become easier once we adjust to this new awareness and realize that the same space that exists there, is all that exists between us and everything... And that space is actually still a part of what completes the whole.  I know this seems kind of esoteric and hard to understand in words, but as you start to see it in your experience, it makes more sense... kind of :)

It's taking a while for me to really wrap my head around, some days it makes total sense, and others I just want to stop the world and get off for a lil break... but I can already notice a greater understanding and acceptance of this new reality.  So be gentle with yourself, and breathe.  Your breath is the space between your past and your future... it is what keeps you balanced.  It is always happening whether we are trying or not.  It keeps us alive, and yet we rarely worry about if and how we will breathe, because we trust that it will happen.  So as we face this new space, it is good to remember that you can always come to your breath and use it as a reminder that everything necessary for our highest and best good will happen without any worry on our part if we just allow it to.  Just as we participate in breathing without getting frustrated or worried about if it's going the way we planned... we can participate in life and allow it to flow through us, and know that things will come and go, as air does, but the next breath will always be there when we need it... no matter what's going on in the space between :) 

Today's Silver Lining

"25 years of my life and still, Trying to get up that great big hill of hope, For a destination. I realized quickly when I knew I should, That the world was made for this, Brotherhood of man, For whatever that means.  And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bed, Just to get it all out, what's in my head
And I, I'm feeling a little peculiar, And so I wake in the morning and I step, Outside and I take deep breath, And I get real high, And I scream to the top of my lungs, 'What's goin' on?"  What's Up- by 4 Non Blondes

What's the Big Idea?

I was listening to a Deepak Chopra CD this morning and he was speaking about intention.  He says it doesn't matter what we say or do, but our intention in doing it.  I started thinking about how a lot of times this affects not only what we say and do, but also how we interpret what others say and do.  Many times when we listen to people, we are not able to hear what they are saying because we only hear what we want.  Of course there's a great quote for that:

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." ~Anais Nin

It seems like everyone has their two cents for any given situation, and often it can be something that has more to do with them than you... And just knowing that is half the battle.  When people do or say things it is good to think of their intention, rather than your interpretation of it... What is their big idea?

For example, let's take my mom.  The woman loves me eternally, and so I know that her intention in telling me something or giving me advice is always coming from a place of love.  So lets pretend she tells me, "Laura, you really need to start working out more." Now it would be easy for me to think many things depending on how fat I feel that day, or how lazy I am.  Some possible thoughts based on my own stuff could be, "She thinks I'm fat," or "Who is she to tell me to work out?!"  Now what happens when I do that, is rather than getting the big idea from her, I am instead making myself angry.  And even though I will say it's her that's making me angry, rest assured that it's me.  Now, if I take a look at the big idea, based on her intention... I would realize it's something more along the lines of, "Laura, I love you and I feel better when I work out, so I want to make sure you feel as good as you can and also ensure you're taking care of yourself so you can live a long, healthy, marvelous life!" 

We could also look at the classic, "Do these jeans make me look fat?" Why a person asks has everything to do with how your answer will affect them.  So first think, what is the big idea behind this question for them?  Are they buying a new pair of jeans and looking for a pair that flatter them?  Are they having a rough day and in need of a little positive affirmation?  Are they putting you to the test?  If you look at the intention first, you realize that the question itself will change accordingly.  "Should I buy these?" "Do you think I look pretty?" "Are you a liar?"

Now this is, as most things are, easier said than done... especially when we're going through a tough situation, feeling vulnerable and everyone seems to keep telling us the same things we already know, yet can't seem to apply at the moment.  This has been happening to me lately.  At first my thoughts were something like this, "No shit Sherlock! Do you think I'm stupid?! Ooooooh, You're so wise because you figured out the obvious.  Take a look in the mirror, I could tell you a few things about your own life that you don't seem to know... I gotta go, BYE!"  Then I took a step back and realized, ya know what... those thoughts are not based on the big idea this person is trying to tell me, they are based on how I feel.  While I am frustrated with the situation, this person seeks to offer me some help because they care.  So now, I just try to listen as they tell me all the things they think I don't already know... because I know that their big idea (most of the time), is to make me feel better.  When I remember this my thoughts become, "Thank you for caring about how I feel and offering me your time and energy to help me through this challenge."  Sometimes just this little step can help us to see those big ideas that actually make us feel better than any words ever could, and If you see their intention as something a little more fabulous than it actually is, that's okay too... And that's my two cents ;)

Today's Silver Lining

"What's the big idea? Yo Mika! I said sucking too hard on your lollipop, Oh loves gonna get you down
I said sucking too hard on your lollipop, Oh, loves gonna get you down. I went walking with my momma one day, When she warned me what people say, Live your life until love is found, 'Cause loves gonna get you down. Take a look at the girl next door, She's a player and a downright bore
Jesus loves her but she wants more, Oh, bad girls get you down." Lollipop- by Mika

Permanently Temporary

These days, it seems harder than ever to keep up with people, even though we're more connected than ever.  You have your digital friends, your work ones, your real ones, your family... all seeing "you" based on the combo of them.  All the while, everyone's trying to ask so many questions, and figure out "the answer"... so that they can have happiness ever after.  Happiness seems to be all the rage lately, and I'm learning more that this trend seems to be depleting happiness more than it enhances it!  I know people mean well, but there is no way someone else can answer your question... there is no way you can just learn happiness... you must experience it.  Happiness is not a place you get to, it is a habit... a daily practice.  It's great for people to spread it... but only you can make it happ(y)en.

So, who are you? What is the answer? Where I am going with this?... Well here.  You may read a quote today that inspires you and totally relates to where you are... or hear a song, or eat a hot dog, or hug a friend, or walk into a 7-11 and overhear 3 words that let you know what's up.  You may find "the answer" in any or all of these things... but the answer is relative to your question... and your question is in constant evolution... and so are you! So be the change! Allow yourself to be totally okay with whatever it is you feel now, and then when it changes... be that!  Be who you are... say what you feel... go where you choose, because there's a reason you want, think and feel all the things you do right now... and there's a reason everyone else does too!  So be patient with people and their brilliant ideas, and hopes, and quotes, and lessons, and changes in these things... because that is who they are now... and there is a reason you are a part of them now whether it registers or not... because now is as permanent as it is temporary :-)

Today's Silver Lining

"There was a time when my world was filled with darkness, darkness, darkness.  And I stopped dreaming now I'm supposed to fill it up with something, something , something. In your eyes I see the eyes of somebody I knew before long long long ago, But I'm still trying to make my mind up, Am I free or am I tied up?  I change shapes just to hide in this place but I'm still, I'm still an animal, Nobody knows it but me when I slip yeah I slip I'm still an animal."  Animal- by Mike Snow

Seen As Is

I feel like I am in my own little Groundhog Day... A part of something that keeps happening over and over again... and I'm stuck until I get it right.  The thing is, I'm having a hard time changing anything in order for that to happen.  It's strange really. I know what's happening... I see the truth of the situation, but then I choose to keep responding the same way over and over, knowing I'm going to get the same result.  So the logical question would be, why don't I just do what needs to be done to change this cycle and move forward... to which I would answer, I don't know. One of the million quotes I call my favorite is, "The heart has reasons that reason cannot know." -- Pascal... And boy is my heart stubborn with it's unreasonable reasons.


In my head, when I'm thinking, planning and remembering the facts... it all seems to make sense.  I know what's been happening, what I need to do, why I need to do it, what will happen if I don't... but then, once the time comes and I'm in the moment, I can't help but feel again, and my heart comes in and does it's thing, and it's back to square one.  The beautiful thing of it all, is that right now, when I can write it all down, get it all out of my head, and see how it feels... it's absolutely perfect.  All the pain and repetition has it's place and has brought me here.  Every move my heart has made, has taught me something, and made it easier for my head to understand it. Right now, it seems silly that I ever thought that I could possibly do anything wrong... that I could make a move that wouldn't somehow lead me here... that anything could ever happen that isn't part of the master plan of my existence and evolution... right now it all seems the stars are perfectly aligned.  And it is right now, that I've realized the reason... because I can see them as they are, and not how I expect them to be ;-)

Today's Silver Lining

"Well hey, well that's the way it is. We gotta make a change... It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.  Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live and let's change the way we treat each other.  You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do what we gotta do, to survive."  Changes- by Tupac

Perfect Timing

I look at some of the things in my life and think, "Wow, that happened at the perfect time."  I also look at somethings and wonder what would happen now if I was to do that again.  They say timing is everything... but I think everything is on time. We may wish things could just happen now, or that we could put life on hold sometimes... but as the saying goes,

"Life can only be understood backward, but it must be lived forward."

Things may seem to happen at the worst time or the best time, but the fact of the matter is, they always happen at the perfect time.  Think back to some of the best stories you tell... they probably involve some unforeseen circumstance that at the time seemed like the end of the world, but now has all worked out.  If you look at the thing in your life that you would classify as the biggest disaster, disappointment, or heartbreak... you could probably stem 3 or more great things from that... Because it's all necessary.

It's just like baking a cake... the flour, raw eggs, salt, butter, sugar, baking soda, etc. don't taste so great on their own, nor would you want to indulge in many of them as they were... but... once they're all mixed up and popped in the oven for a while, they come out tasting like a dream!

Such is life my friends.  Cakes need a lot of boring flour to make up the consistency... we need a lot of seemingly boring stuff to make up our fluffy, yummy life.  When things seem to take to long, we have to trust that they're still not quite cooked yet. When we put things into perspective like that, and think of the universe, God, whatever you wanna call that force, as our baker... we have to trust that anything that's added into our lives is necessary for our recipe, that today's icky baking powder, is just a small ingredient in our delicious life... and that everything is being mixed, beaten and baked at the perfect time ;-)

Today's Silver Lining

"And in the daylight we can hitchhike to Maine, I hope that someday I’ll see without these frames, And in the daylight I don’t pick up my phone, ‘Cause in the daylight anywhere feels like home, I have five clocks in my life, And only one has the time right, I’ll just unplug it for today, I’ll just unplug it for today."  Daylight- by Matt and Kim

What Would You Do?

If I wrote a blog each hour, I would have a crazy spectrum of feelings, thoughts and beliefs... because in each moment things can change so much.  However, there are those certain things that seem to be consistent.  It is the core of your belief structure that the others stem from, so what's at your core?  I read a great quote by Wallace D. Wattles that says:

"Whatever you habitually think yourself to be, that you are. You must form, now, a greater and better habit; you must form a conception of yourself as a being of limitless power, and habitually think that you are that being.  It is the habitual, not the periodical thought that decides your destiny."

So if thoughts become things... it's those thoughts that you're always thinking, even without thinking, not the ones that just pop in for a quick visit.  It's those thoughts, because you believe them... and chances are you believe them because of some experience.  We have thoughts all the time that come and go, but when something happens that affects us, we tend to remember it more.  When we do things, and begin to see results, good or bad, we tend to believe them.  So, while you may have some thoughts that are silly at the time... it's what you do with them, that becomes believable.

Today's Silver Lining

"Ghosts in the photograph never lied to me.  I'd be all of that.  I'd be all of that.  A false memory would be everything. A denial my eliminent."  Take Me Somewhere Nice- by Mogwai